Is my husband really being mean or am I just to sensitive or both?

So first of all any time my husband and I have a discussion where we may or may not agree completely he points out that he can not have a intelligent or articulated conversation with me (that is if I don’t agree with him) and it’s very hurtful when he says that. He says it in such a cruel manner that it's getting worse hearing it over time. Today I asked him if this year during the holidays we could try and take the kids to more events and really get into the holiday cheer. I love the holiday’s period and he thinks there a big scam. Mind you when we were dating it was like he loved all the same things, then we got married this year and he suddenly became scrooge. Big change there. He asked me why the holidays matter and I told him because they actually make me happy when I participate in the season and the festivities. He said that wasn't an answer and he wanted an answer. I told him because of the lights, music, cool air, the kid’s smiles all of the other holiday like things, I love it all. Then he came back with I am 25 and those aren't a 25 year olds answers. Grow up he says. Then I get upset and he said he can't carry an intelligent conversation with me ever. Is that mean or am I too sensitive. This is just one of many things that he is just a little cruel about...like taking a break one evening from housework (oh and he is home too but not lifting a finger), not waking him up for work in the morning on time (he has an alarm and I am busy with my son), being upset because all he does is play cards on the weekends and never makes plans for "us" or the "family". He is never available and when he is he either sits on the couch and does nothing, yells at me for not doing his whites or has his friends over for cards. I am really trying to see the bright side of things but he is just getting on my last nerve and really hurting me. It’s really hard to ask all of this in one shot but I have to get some unbiased opinions on this. And I know he knows its somewhat wrong to say those things because he turns around and tries to hug me or snuggle just moments after either that or like I have pointed out to him before he is trying to smoothi it over with me so he can end the conversation without hearing me b*tch later.